Today during my ride (the last of the rest and recovery phase…) I started having a conversation with myself. Don’t laugh – I’m pretty confident you do the same during your rides….

This particular conversation had to do with wondering when I would be “good enough”. Now it was a short-lived conversation but basically it centred around my desire to race as well as I know I can. In past years, particularly last year, I haven’t raced as well as I would have liked. I was always hovering, hanging on, holding back – not quite doing what I wanted. Sure I had some really good rides but not the rides I wanted – simply put I didn’t feel like I was riding “good enough”.

Today I started thinking about what “good enough” really means? Does it mean winning every race you enter? Does it mean giving it your all each and every time you line up? Does it mean consistently improving through-out the season? Does it mean setting goals and achieving those goals? Does it mean recognizing your weaknesses and attacking these with zest and passion? What does “good enough” really mean?

Tough one eh?

So now I’m going to attempt to explain what “good enough” means to me right now today on July 28, 2011. Today it means being able to get out and smash myself on my bike for multiple days in a row – this shows that I’m good enough to train hard again. Today it means going out on my cyclo-cross bike and pushing my limits to the point of outright terrifying myself and then pushing it that last little bit – this shows that I’m good enough to accept that I need to improve and learn. Today it means approaching each ride and effort with optimism and the belief that I can always ride harder and faster – this shows that I’m good enough to be confident in my abilities. Today it means putting together an overambitious racing calendar and listening to my coach and husband when they tell me I’m crazy – this shows I’m good enough to want to get out and race each and every time I can.

Yes, I’m good enough. I’m far away from the athlete I was a few years ago when I worried that other people wouldn’t think I’m good enough. I have learned – particularly thanks to last season – that people are going to think what they think – regardless of if they really know you and what is going behind-the-scenes.

So yes, I’m good enough. Today, I’m good enough. On September 10 – my first race of the season – I’ll be reminding myself of this very fact – I’m good enough and I’m only going to get gooder (sorry couldn’t help myself!).

To be blunt: I’m feeling good and I’m going to roll with this.

I’m on four days of rest and recovery. This is so hard for me right now! I feel like I just got started and really didn’t want to take any recovery days just yet. But looking ahead to the coming days and weeks of training, I’ve got lots of heavy days scheduled so I guess some rest and recovery makes sense. But it is still hard to do!

I had some really good training over the past weekend. Saturday was super busy with running, hot power yoga and a long ride on the ‘cross bike working on skills and thrills. By the end of this day of training I was pretty wiped out – amazing how quickly your legs can scream at you when running up a sand dune with a bike on your shoulder! Sunday I hooked up with the Stevens Bikes Canada men’s team for a ride out to Merrickville. This was a great road ride – lots of good conversations and laughs (okay – I did a lot of the talking) and I got in some good hard efforts at the front. It is really refreshing to ride with a group of guys who are so passionate about bikes and most importantly making the most of each day.

Assuming it isn’t raining tomorrow night, I’ll ride out to watch the local training crit. I really wish I was racing it, but there is a plan and I have to follow the plan. Speaking of plan – I had a great talk with my coach on Thursday and I know things are really going to come together well for the season.

I’m feeling super good. Confidence is high. Physically I’m doing really well. And everything away from the bike that has to happen off the bike to have a successful season is coming together as well.

Alright, the new clothing design is done and ready to go. Many many thanks to super patient and brilliant graphic designer Allison Goodall. Check out Allison’s site – she does great work and really has designed me a super racing kit.

So when I emailed Allison I told her I wanted a simple design and that my favorite color is purple. I pointed her to a few clothing designs that I like and literally told her to do what she wanted. Well, lets just say I’m stoked.

Check it out:

I’m also super happy to be working with the gang at Champion Systems Canada again this season. It is nice to know I’ll have a good-looking completely custom racing kit that fits well and can handle the Belgian mud, sand and rain!

Nyow, I don’t profess to be any sort of expert when it comes to training the physical body for cyclo-cross. If it was up to me I’d ride long and hard each and everyday with multiple double days thrown into the mix. Yep – not exactly the scientific approach – this is why I’ve got a fine coach keeping care of me.

But what I have learned a lot about over these years of cyclo-cross specific training is how the training progression works (at least for me). When I first started really getting into cyclo-cross I was racing at the local Ottawa level and was honestly still struggling with barrier dismounts. So number one – learn how to dismount and mount my bike properly. I spent an entire fall and early winter focusing on this technique – every lunchtime I would take my trusty barrier out to a nearby park and practice. By  the middle of that season, I had this technique down really well.

This gave me confidence to race harder and to relax when I came upon the barriers or stairs in a race. Of course I had neglected to practice cornering, cambers and loose terrain riding. So this is where the gradual progression came in. The following season I trained with Marc and another friend, working on cornering and bike handling skills. We would train in a local park and set up grids and courses using little flags. This worked really well, I learned how my bike handles and started to understand the concept of letting the bike do the work.

The last couple of seasons saw me change up my technical training even more. I still did work with the flags, still practiced my dismounting/mounting skills but I added in an additional element – actual cyclo-cross riding. That is I sought out trails and areas that provided challenging terrain and demanded similar skills to those required in cyclo-cross races. Progressing me to actual “race-like” training scenarios. This made a big difference and helped my technical skills improve greatly.

And now here I am this season, really only doing work in the woods and on the trails. I’ve learned that I still have trouble with cornering (I like to corner like a crit racer…) and I’ve really been working on pushing my limits on my bike. This means getting comfortable with taking lots of speed into elements and letting the terrain slow me down – rather than braking too much. I’ve also been working on subtle techniques such as using my upper body to help propel the bike through sand, up steep climbs and over tricky sections. Yes, I still do practice my dismounting/mounting skills but now I incorporate this into a small track that I’ve put together and really pay attention to carrying as much speed into the barrier, over the barrier and back onto the bike.

So what I’m trying to explain here is that there needs to be a real progression with your technical cyclo-cross training. If you’re new to the sport, there is no point on focusing on off-camber riding skills and descending techniques if you still aren’t comfortable with a bike dismount. As well once you reach a more competitive level or are racing in Europe, it is time to change up your training to better reflect the race scenarios you’ll see.

Anyway, just my two cent on technical training for cyclo-cross. I know there are lots of opinions on how to do this and what to do. But I think this really comes down to the individual skill of the rider. I’m pretty sure that Sven Nys and I do very different technical training sessions on the bike – but we’re both getting what we need. Make sure you’re getting what you need!

What does strength mean to you? Perhaps it refers to the numbers you see on your SRM or other power meter? Maybe it is all about spinning a 53 x 11 like Fabian? Or maybe it is all about doing a super long hard ride and winning every town sign sprint?

Well, I’ve been thinking a lot about strength these days. We all know that what makes bike racing so fascinating is that the strongest rider doesn’t necessarily win. Numbers on the SRM don’t necessarily translate to race success. Strength is in my mind these days now that I’m back on a regular training program and I’m once again training with purpose and focus. I look at the numbers on my SRM and at times I’m overjoyed and other times I’m crushed.

And this is where I start to wonder if strength really does just come from the legs? I like to think not. A strong mind can take you a long way in a bike race. Heck, just watch the Tour and watch the feats of survival that a rider like Hogerland has made lately. Surviving a race and requiring 44 stitches and earning the polka dot jersey as well – yep this is strength -but it goes beyond the legs.

It hits to the very heart and soul of a being. So as I pedal away and focus on my SRM, I’m also really working on my inner strength. The strength that has allowed me to get through some rough patches that for some would have seen the bike put away for another day. But, don’t get me wrong – I struggle with this strength as well. I’ve been known to think and even say “it is just too hard” “I can’t do it” “you don’t understand what it is like”. Now I like to believe that I’m beyond these thoughts and statements – my inner strength is improving just as the strength in my legs is improving.

There really is not much point in having one without the other.