I had planned to write this post on Monday but I ran into some problems with my domain… Turns out my domain was put on hold so this website was down for a few stressful days. But all is good in the land of Ottawa.cx again (thanks to Marc and his super sleuthing). Yesterday was a super busy day that left no time for blogging. Lets just say some cool opportunities are brewing that took up a large part of my attention span yesterday…

But now, now I have time so here goes nothing. Things I’ve Learned:

• Running can be fun. Running in the woods and trails is much better than running along the hot asphalt. Running up hills is not that much fun but the pay-off will be huge.
• Riding my bike helps me chase away my intermittent moodiness. A strange mood that can’t be explained can be chased away with a good hard and long bike ride.
• When your headphones stop working properly and you have to listen to crackly music and at times no sound from your left headphone, it can be frustrating. Using one headphone works but is not optimum.
• Food is good. Remembering to eat properly before a ride is very important. Even if you don’t think you’re hungry, eat something  – particularly if it has been five hours since breakfast and you’re about to head out for a 3 hour ride. A Clif Bar is good. A mixture of Vega Choc-A-Lot smoothie with chia seeds is very good (particularly when chopped apples are added to this). Yes this last combination sounds strange but trust me on this. If you’re not sure, eat a Clif Bar.
• The few weeks leading up to the cyclo-cross season are both exciting and downright terrifying. Can’t wait to race but slightly feeling uneasy about how I’ll do. But at least I know my bikes will be fast and my cycling kit will look good.
• Some time away from the computer, the bike, the running shoes and the day-to-day can be very valuable. Sitting down with a good book or magazine, a steaming mug of coffee or tea and sitting outside for a while can do wonders for the soul.
• I like caffeine. Yesterday for a brief moment I thought maybe I’d give up on my earl grey tea. I only drink decaf coffee. I had this idea that if I removed the earl grey tea from my diet I would help my performance. But, I really look forward to my earl grey tea. So I’ll stick with the caffeine.
• Veganism is a great way of eating. But I can’t do it full-time. I like meat. I need B12 (I can’t take over-the-counter supplements). I need to a lot of food when I’m a vegan – this makes groceries expensive. So I eat vegan/vegetarian for 5 or 6 days and eat meat on the other 1 or 2 days. This balance works perfectly.
• Life is good. Some days I feel overwhelmed and super busy. But this is a good thing. This means I’m healthy, I’m fortunate and I’ve got a lot to look forward to.
• I’m lucky. I believe this luck has happened because I try to be a good person. I’m not the best person. But I try to be positive and to be optimistic. Some days this is easier than on others. But so long as the ratio leans to the good more than the bad, then this is all I can hope for.
• That sometimes blog posts can get a bit long. So I’m going to stop now.

Today during my ride (the last of the rest and recovery phase…) I started having a conversation with myself. Don’t laugh – I’m pretty confident you do the same during your rides….

This particular conversation had to do with wondering when I would be “good enough”. Now it was a short-lived conversation but basically it centred around my desire to race as well as I know I can. In past years, particularly last year, I haven’t raced as well as I would have liked. I was always hovering, hanging on, holding back – not quite doing what I wanted. Sure I had some really good rides but not the rides I wanted – simply put I didn’t feel like I was riding “good enough”.

Today I started thinking about what “good enough” really means? Does it mean winning every race you enter? Does it mean giving it your all each and every time you line up? Does it mean consistently improving through-out the season? Does it mean setting goals and achieving those goals? Does it mean recognizing your weaknesses and attacking these with zest and passion? What does “good enough” really mean?

Tough one eh?

So now I’m going to attempt to explain what “good enough” means to me right now today on July 28, 2011. Today it means being able to get out and smash myself on my bike for multiple days in a row – this shows that I’m good enough to train hard again. Today it means going out on my cyclo-cross bike and pushing my limits to the point of outright terrifying myself and then pushing it that last little bit – this shows that I’m good enough to accept that I need to improve and learn. Today it means approaching each ride and effort with optimism and the belief that I can always ride harder and faster – this shows that I’m good enough to be confident in my abilities. Today it means putting together an overambitious racing calendar and listening to my coach and husband when they tell me I’m crazy – this shows I’m good enough to want to get out and race each and every time I can.

Yes, I’m good enough. I’m far away from the athlete I was a few years ago when I worried that other people wouldn’t think I’m good enough. I have learned – particularly thanks to last season – that people are going to think what they think – regardless of if they really know you and what is going behind-the-scenes.

So yes, I’m good enough. Today, I’m good enough. On September 10 – my first race of the season – I’ll be reminding myself of this very fact – I’m good enough and I’m only going to get gooder (sorry couldn’t help myself!).

To be blunt: I’m feeling good and I’m going to roll with this.

I’m on four days of rest and recovery. This is so hard for me right now! I feel like I just got started and really didn’t want to take any recovery days just yet. But looking ahead to the coming days and weeks of training, I’ve got lots of heavy days scheduled so I guess some rest and recovery makes sense. But it is still hard to do!

I had some really good training over the past weekend. Saturday was super busy with running, hot power yoga and a long ride on the ‘cross bike working on skills and thrills. By the end of this day of training I was pretty wiped out – amazing how quickly your legs can scream at you when running up a sand dune with a bike on your shoulder! Sunday I hooked up with the Stevens Bikes Canada men’s team for a ride out to Merrickville. This was a great road ride – lots of good conversations and laughs (okay – I did a lot of the talking) and I got in some good hard efforts at the front. It is really refreshing to ride with a group of guys who are so passionate about bikes and most importantly making the most of each day.

Assuming it isn’t raining tomorrow night, I’ll ride out to watch the local training crit. I really wish I was racing it, but there is a plan and I have to follow the plan. Speaking of plan – I had a great talk with my coach on Thursday and I know things are really going to come together well for the season.

I’m feeling super good. Confidence is high. Physically I’m doing really well. And everything away from the bike that has to happen off the bike to have a successful season is coming together as well.