Moving Forward

Some of you might be wondering what is next for me now that it is pretty darn clear that I won’t be racing at the World Cyclo-Cross Championships…. Well, I had an excellent talk with my coach Steve Weller of Bell Lap Coaching yesterday about this very topic.

First off, I have to say that this season really has been a struggle. It is hard to have put in so much hardwork and training over the spring and summer only to have it not come to full fruition during the race season. There is nothing more frustrating than racing my own body. I admit that at times I have faltered. Wondered if I should take a break and just take a step back. But in my heart of hearts I know this is not the right answer for me. Through all the health struggles I’m having, the one thing that has allowed me to keep going is knowing that I’m not doing any further damage to my body by training. I’m not slowing down my healing process so there is no point in taking a break.

One thing that came up with my talk with Steve is how frustrated I am at often being last. Being last sucks. There is no other way to state this. I hate it. I’m frustrated because I know that I’m not a last placed rider. I’ve developed fitness and skills that if I was 100 per cent healthy would put me higher on the results list. But right now I have to accept where I am. This is not where I want to be and I know that next year I won’t be here again.

So, this should give you an idea of what is around the corner for me. Status quo. Yep, keep on training. Keep on racing. Keep on learning. Keep on getting better. Keep on getting healthy. Essentially right now, I’m building towards next year. I’m focused on maximizing my time here in Belgium. This means doing all the racing I can. Getting in all the technical training and learning I can. Getting out on my bike in all types of conditions so that on race day I’m ready for the frozen mud, frozen sand, squishy sticky mud, intense descents, and wheel-sucking sand.

Really all I can do is what I’ve been doing. Yes, I’m thoroughly disappointed to not be going to the big show in St. Wendel, Germany. But I’ve had an idea for a while now that this would be an uphill battle this year. I’ve raced at the World Cyclo-Cross Championships once. And I know that I’ll do it again. It just won’t be this season.

Back At It

Well, I’m back home in Ottawa. Definitely was awesome to travel and race in the first two World Cups of the season but it is also pretty special to be home. The 12 day trip was pretty darn good with every day really being a separate adventure. Where would I ride? What would I see and discover? What would we see while driving and touring around? What would the race courses be like? How many friends would I bump into and catch up with? Each and every day was filled with such experiences. Pretty darn good for 12 days.

But I must say it was nice to wake up in my own bed this morning, albeit rather early (4:30 – thanks jet lag). It was also refreshing to simply hop on my bike for my ride and not worry about getting lost and trying to memorize the streets signs and all the left and right turns…. I’m always one for adventure but sometimes the training goes more smoothly when I know that I won’t get lost or end up on a fast moving highway in Germany.

I had a great talk with my coach Steve Weller of Bell Lap Coaching. We talked about the past 12 days of travel, training and racing. Going into these World Cups I knew I wasn’t on top form but somehow I managed to forget this and expect a top form performance from myself. Luckily Steve knows me very well and understands what I’m going through right now. I’ve got a great training plan thanks to Steve that will take me into just after the Koksijde World Cup on Nov. 27. I’m looking forward to getting out on my bike and doing some intensity and long rides again – I’ve really missed this.

Today my ride was just what I needed. I got out on my ‘cross bike for an on-road/off-road ride. I hit up some bicycle paths, rolled along some bumpy grass trails, more bicycle paths and finally made it to a fairly underused local park. I rolled along the gravel path taking a few side trails along the way that emptied into a quarry. So far so good. Then I spied a very small opening in the grass…. An undiscovered trail – cool. Well, what a cool trail it is – twists, turns, up, down, rocks, roots, leaves, pine needles – it has it all. Maybe my Fangos pumped up to 50 psi were a bit much for the trail but I still made it through – besides it helps to get used to the rear wheel slip sliding all over the place. A great ride. I had Pearl Jam blasting on my iPod and the sun was shining – and luckily no sign of “jet legs”.

Tomorrow the action starts with some intense intervals. As nice as it is outside, I’ll be doing this ride in the basement on the Computrainer. I’d love to do it outside but I don’t have my SRM on my bike yet so I’ll be in the basement. No biggie really – I want to make sure these intervals are as high quality as possible and often this is better achieved on a trainer. I’ll be sure to get outside for the recovery portion of my ride.

Looking forward to this Saturday when we’re hooking up with local young and fast guns for a cyclo-cross ride. Should be a good one. I do have to go for a run beforehand – but the run will only make the ride that much sweeter. (Still amazes me that I ran a marathon once… Now a 20 minute run feels like work!)

Can you believe that in two weeks I’ll be back in Belgium? Hard to wrap my head around it. I’m really only home for 10 days and then I’m gone. And next weekend I’ll be away in Toronto racing at the Canadian National Cyclo-Cross Championships. Pretty fast and whirlwind but this is what keeps me looking and feeling young!

I’ve moved up on the UCI points ranking – I’m now in 55th spot. Not bad. But I’d like to get into the top 50 again and keep my spot there. I’ve got 47 UCI points – I need 75 to get into the selection pool for the Canadian Team that will race at the World Cyclo-Cross Championships. I’m not stressing about this points chase race. Nope, I’m sticking to my commitment to go out and have fun on my bike – I’ll line up with a smile on my face, I’ll stay relaxed, no crazy nerves or stressing about points. Nope – time to just go out and appreciate being able to do this.

Alright, my tea is getting cold and it is time to catch up with dirty little television show addiction – Top Chef Just Desserts….

New England Worlds – Kinda Sorta

I had really been looking forward to racing at “New England Worlds” aka “Gloucester” all season. But sadly it is not to be. Those tests I had done earlier in the week revealed some additional health issues that I need to sort out in order to be healthy. I’ve learned that I’m really just getting by thanks to my fitness and cycling-determination…. Once again a testament to how living a healthy and active lifestyle can keep you out of the hospital and living a full life. Problem is, that as a result of the ulcerative colitis flare, I’ve developed a pretty severe bout of anemia coupled with a too low hemoglobin/red blood cell count. This explains a lot. In a strange way it is a relief. This news explains why each race this year has been a struggle.

How am I feeling? Well, in a way, relieved – now we know what is going on. But in another way, I’m damn mad. I’m downright angry. Why does happen to me? Why do those people who eat poorly, don’t exercise and quite frankly treat their bodies like garbage disposals, manage to avoid the problems I’m having? Some days I feel like pulling up to the nearest golden arches and hunkering down to a Big Mac, large fries, and chocolate shake. But I don’t. And I won’t. Because that is not the attitude that got me here.

Got me here to this place where I’m surrounded by super friends and sponsors. Friends who cheer for me no matter how I’m riding. Friends who encourage me every step of the way. Friends who when I’ve cracked, have been quick to send emails and post comments reminding me to keep chasing the dream. Friends who know what it is like. Sponsors who were there in the beginning when I was transitioning into elite racing. Sponsors who believed in me to provide me with bikes, clothing, food, shoes, helmets, travel and living support. Sponsors who know that I’ve got lots of great races left in me. (Do yourself a favor and check out my sponsors – some top-notch products and people. Overwhelmed would be the appropriate word.)

I’ve had a few pity parties for myself this season. Wondering what is going on. Why can’t I ride like I did last year? I even asked myself if I still wanted it? And the answer: Yes I want it. Yes, I will be racing at the World Champs in St. Wendel, Germany. Yes, I know I can compete with the best. Yes, I know I’m stronger and smarter than this time last year. Yes. Yes. Yes.

So this weekend there will be no racing for me. I’ll be cheering on my favorite guy. Doing whatever he needs to ensure he has two excellent races. Gloucester is a special place for us. This is the first race we traveled to outside of Canada. This is the first time I stood in the pits. This is the first time I saw the elite women whiz by and wished I could be like them. Gloucester is the first time I stood on the podium. Gloucester is where we were bitten by the ‘cross bug. Can’t hardly wait to get there. If you see me in the pits or roaming around, stop me and say “hello”. Looking forward to a great weekend of racing, cheering, friends, and hanging out.

Checking in from San Diego

After a whirlwind weekend in Vermont I now find myself in San Diego, California. Sunday was a great day of hanging out at the Catamount Outdoor Center watching the racing action. It was hard not to race but that crash I had on Saturday really did a number on my shoulder.

By Saturday night I could barely lift my arm… So there was definitely no racing for me on Sunday. I thought I had separated my shoulder but thanks to some amazing attention and care from Deb Paulson, I learned that my shoulder is not separated just badly strained. Deb is a massage therapist and she did some amazing release work on my shoulder and gave it a thorough assessment. Thanks Deb for the help on Sunday! The shoulder is feeling much better today. It is at about 75% so I’m confident that it will be fine for tomorrow’s race in Las Vegas.

So with no racing for me on Sunday, it was fun to just 100 per cent focus on Marc and his race. Boy oh boy did he ever have a good ride! It was awesome to see him riding so well and to just keep digging deeper and deeper. I was so proud to see him race so well. Many thanks to Conor for doing the pit duty for me on Sunday – this gave me a chance to relax and hang out with my parents for a bit.

Really the day was just about hanging out and watching racing. I got to catch up with lots of friends and meet new people. Can’t ask for much more from a day. Thanks to everyone who gave me words of encouragement and the odd hug here and there. I really appreciate it. This is a hard and frustrating time but I know that I just have to keep digging deep and pushing forward and good things will come.

After some frantic bike packing on Sunday followed by a relaxing evening with Jenn and Shane I was quickly at the airport on Monday morning at 5 a.m…. What seemed like the longest day ever ended with my arriving in San Diego to connect with the KingsBridge crew at the DRJ Fall World show. Good day at the show capped off with a fine sushi dinner and then I was back to the hotel to build one bike and get some much needed rest.

I had a great ride this morning along the San Diego Bay. I hooked up with a small group of cyclists for a bit and then did some exploring on my own. This afternoon we’re driving to Las Vegas and tomorrow it will be go time. Yes, I’m nervous about tomorrow. But I just have to line up and race as hard as I can. This is all I can do. This is what I will do. Had a great talk with my coach today and I’m feeling pretty good about tomorrow. Looking forward to visiting Interbike on Thursday as well. It will be a whirlwind couple of days but it will be a “good” whirlwind.

Oh, some disappointing news… The UCI Cyclo-Cross Training Camp is canceled. This is a real drag. Upside is I’ll get to race at Gloucester now! Haven’t raced there since I won the women’s 3/4 race in 2008. It will be great to race there again. The real hassle is now I have to change my ticket again… I originally booked my flight for the first World Cup in Aigle, Switzerland on Oct. 17 and then I changed the flight so I could do the ‘cross camp and now I’ll have to change it again… Each time I change the flight it is a minimum $250 charge… Sigh. Oh well, not like I can flap my arms and “fly” myself there!

Well, next check in will be from Las Vegas. Be sure to send me some speedy vibes for around 8:20 Las Vegas time Wednesday night. Thanks again for the kind words, emails and positive thoughts.

Motoring Along

This morning I realized that I’m ready. Really ready. I got out for a ride behind the motorbike and the body sensations were good. (Can’t say much for the ridiculous wind…) But nonetheless it was an excellent ride. Nothing quite like the feeling of speed when sitting just off the back of the motorbike with the legs spinning at 115 rpm and the wattage numbers looking sharp. Does so much for the body, mind, and soul. Just what I need a few days out from my first race of the season.

Tomorrow is looking like another most excellent day of cyclo-cross action. I’ve got a cyclo-cross practice session in the morning. Followed by a spin on the ‘cross bike. Then in the evening I’m hooking up with Karl and maybe Marc and Evan for some ‘cross skills work and a little bit of videotaping. A good day indeed.

I find the hardest thing for me these days is to take it easy. I’m feeling so good and I just want to squeeze as much as I can out of every training ride. I’m so tempted to throw in extra work-outs and to extend every ride. I know – this is not the best way to do things. I’m trying really hard not to do “too much”. Yes, it is possible to do to much. I have to remember I’ve got some busy weeks of travel and racing coming up. I guess it is just because I’m feeling so good and I feel as though I’ve progressed so far this summer that I want to see what else I can get out of myself. All in due time I suppose.

Pretty much all the plans have come together now for the cyclo-cross season. I finalized a car lease today – thanks to AutoCar Europe for the outstanding assistance. I managed to lease a Peugeot Tepee at a very reasonable price. This is a big weight off my mind. The Las Vegas trip is all sorted now – thanks to uber-planner and sponsor Skip Williams of KingsBridge for helping make this trip possible.

Actually, this is the perfect time to say thank-you to all my sponsors. The season starts on Saturday and truly without their support, I don’t know what I’d be doing. So without further adieu – thanks to the fine companies and individuals who are making my cyclo-cross racing dreams and goals a real possibility and reality for me:

  • KingsBridge: what can I say about this company of fine people? KingsBridge helps me out with all the “behind the scenes” stuff needed to make a cyclo-cross racing season come together. Owner Skip Williams had never heard of cyclo-cross until he started sponsoring me – and now he’s coming down to Cross Vegas to take in the action! Check out the KingsBridge blog, follow KingsBridge on Twitter, and check out the Facebook page.
  • The Cyclery: each time I walk into The Cyclery I really am overwhelmed. Owner Vince Caceres and his staff really do go that extra mile for me. Whether it is ordering in new chainrings, helping me choose new shoes, answering endless questions about my gear, and helping me out of last minute jams. My Stevens Bikes are built and maintained at The Cyclery – and for this I’m so grateful for – I know that they are well-built and will run perfectly all season. Vince does so much for the Ottawa cycling community that really does go overlooked – it is not often you’ll find a business owner who is willing to do so much for others for so little in return. If you’re looking for a bike, a helmet, shoes, some snazzy Icebreaker clothing, or maybe you just want to look at some cool bikes – be sure to visit The Cyclery.
  • Stevens Bikes: the support that Stevens Bikes gives me really is more than I can have ever imagined. I’m super lucky to have two brand new Stevens Carbon Team DA cyclo-cross bikes to race on this season. I’ve been riding Stevens Bikes since 2008 and I really wouldn’t have it any other way. The bikes are super reliable, fast, they turn well, take a beating, and they look damn good. Can’t ask for much more out of a bike. Thanks so much to Stevens Bikes Canada for the amazing support – I feel pretty fortunate to be riding on such solid cyclo-cross bikes and to have the Stevens Bikes logo on my clothing. Be sure to check out the new line-up of Stevens Bikes and don’t forget to follow Stevens Bikes Canada on Twitter and to visit the Stevens Bikes Canada Facebook page.
  • Champion Systems Canada: thanks to this clothing company, my Ottawa Cross clothing looks darn sharp. Not only does it look good, it fits well and I’m well prepared for the cyclo-cross season. Snow, mud, rain, ice, and the cold won’t be an issue thanks to the warm, waterproof and resilient clothing. I’m literally covered from head to toe with skinsuits, base layers, jerseys, thermal vests, thermal jackets, bib tights and for off the bike, I’ve got a waterproof, windproof, three-in-one coat to keep me toasty. If you need clothing and you want it done right and on-time, do yourself a favor and contact Champions Systems Canada.
  • Clif Bar: mmm, Peanut Butter Crunch, Chocolate Mint, Double Expresso, Caramel Nut Brownie – can’t go wrong with these flavors in your jersey pocket. Clif Bar is one of these companies that really is rock solid. Not only do they make excellent products for bike racers like me, but the company itself is just top-notch. I like the product, I like the people, and I like what Clif Bar does for its community-at-large. Do yourself a favor, slide some Clif Shot Bloks (Tropical Punch is very tasty) and a Chocolate Mint Clif Bar into your jersey the next time you go for a ride. Believe me, you’ll be well-fueled and your taste buds will thank-you. Oh, and to learn more about nutrition and sports, be sure to listen to the ClifCast.
  • Bell Lap Coaching: Steve Weller of Bell Lap Coaching makes it all happen. This is the guy with the plan, the vision, the knowledge, the patience, and the wisdom to make my racing seasons come together. No challenge is to big for Steve – when I told him I wanted to race at the World Cyclo-Cross Championships, he didn’t blink – he just said that “we’d make it happen”. This guy keeps me from doing too much and for pushing me that extra bit when I need it. His advice and knowledge really make the difference between a coach and a trainer. Bell Lap Coaching is going to get you where you want to be.
  • Outdoor Gear Canada: thanks to Outdoor Gear Canada, I’m riding on and using the best equipment out there. Fast and reliable wheels? Thanks to OGC, I’ve got them. A flashy and rock-solid helmet? Yep – got one of these as well. Stiff shoes that can take a beating? Oh yah, I’ve got these. OGC fills in the blanks for me and makes sure that I’ve got all the pieces I need to keep me rolling along quickly, safely, and smoothly. And I’ve got to say, yellow shoes are pretty darn awesome!
  • Oakley: be fast and look good – this is easily done thanks to Oakley. I’ve got some pretty hot glasses to wear this season including my pick of lenses to suit any light and course conditions. I’ve got to say that having worn Oakley glasses, I don’t think I can go back to my dollar store specials. These glasses really are the bomb. Beyond glasses, Oakley can set you up with some solid and durable luggage and snazzy clothing. Oakley – really what else is there to say?

Thanks so much for the support this season. I’m looking forward to another great year with many good things to come. I’ve set the bar high again this year, because really there is no other way to race or live.